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valleyspeak
valleyspeak
At long last, Yahoo reorg to put employees out of their misery
Yahoo is about to perform that dreaded big-tech-company maneuver, the "reorg." For you young-uns who don't get why reorg is such a scary word: Think massive layoffs, lost mortgages, and people like your parents with no back-to-school money for brats like you. Multiply by 10,000-plus. I can only wish a soft landing for the folks who designed, built and shipped Yahoo's new search engine interface, and the marketers who dreamed up those radio ads that got me to — I can't believe I'm admitting this on a blog — actually use Yahoo to find stuff. More »
Valleyspeak
Seesmic launch illustrates how Metcalfe's Law and Dunbar's Number correlate
Some of the most pervasive buzzwords in the Valley are terms to classify product or idea adoption, such as "early adopter," which serves to define a behavior profile of a customer or user who's always trying the newest new thing. As a product's appeal widens, it begins to attract the "early mainstream," or the network of acquaintances inspired by the early adopter to try the not newest but still new thing. Now that Seesmic has launched publicly and gotten a vag-tastic kickoff, the early mainstream has started to participate, as exemplified by the drunk cry for help (or a mockery thereof) above, which is much more typical of YouTube than the community fostered on Seesmic while the site was still only adding users by invitation — this earnest response is more typical of Seesmic's early adopters. Which means we need to update another hoary Valley cliche, Metcalfe's Law. More »
5:00 PM on Wed Jun 18 2008
By Jackson West
537 views,
8 comments
Latest by Shadowlayer: So according to Metcalfe FB is now worth $3600000000000000? Riiiiiight... more »
valleyspeak
"Donutfest"
"Tumblr is totally estrogen-y," blogger Jessica Gold Haralson told Silicon Alley Insider, explaining the heavy female presence at a party for the blogging startup. "If anything, it's a complete donutfest." "Donutfest" is the opposite of the far more common "sausagefest," which describes a heavily male event, such as today's Apple Worldwide Developers Conference. (For the record, this editor wonders what's wrong with enjoying sausage.) Do we need to explain the anatomical reference? (Photo by fillyjonk)
valleyspeak
Five words or phrases to short on the slang stock exchange
CollegeHumor cofounder Ricky Van Veen has decided to short the word "douche."After a strong resurgence in 2005 and showing strong staying power through 2007, lately most of the people I've seen use it fit into two categories: 1) people over 40 who have finally had the word passed down the cool chain from their younger friends and coworkers. 2) the "douches" originally being described themselves.We second this call. In fact, our own very special correspondent banned douche not long ago. Below, five more words we'd like to see tank. State your portfolio position and suggest other picks in the comments. More »
valleyspeak
Marketing vs. advertising vs. PR vs. branding explained
The original is ok, but this edit is the best.
valleyspeak
Why don't you just read Valleywag? That seems easier
Commenter Matthew O'Ryan is on to us. He's noticed how a throwaway line has become our new catchphrase: "That seems easier." In an industry full of people who claim to be obsessed with efficiency, why do we have to keep explaining over and over the simple way to do things? Because Valley denizens secretly love doing things the hard way — and they hate it when people point out we're doing it wrong. Neophilia, cast as a love of innovation, is actually an algorithm for generating ever-changing shibboleths that keep outsiders away. They make things complicated because it entertains them; because they love challenges and puzzles; because they can. But the world that pays their bills? Customers like things simple. Why not keep them happy? Ah, but you know how that would seem.
10:20 AM on Fri Mar 28 2008
By Owen Thomas
464 views,
7 comments
Latest by robinwauters: Ha, but at least I got around to registering thatseemseasier.com ! You can have it for as little as $ 300 000. Actually, strike that: I'll settle for € 300 000 ;) I promise to pay myself a $ 1 dollar only more »
valleyspeak
Leah Culver tries to coin a catchphrase
From the Future of Web Apps conference in Miami: "Leah Culver is trying to coin the term 'social messaging' as a way to describe Pownce." I suppose that's better than "social massaging."
A tipster writes of the cuts at Yahoo: "Maria Hinge, the VP for emerging European markets, got laid off on Friday. She's credited with rolling out services in Turkey, Russia, Poland and the Czech Republic. However, her reports always thought she was more adept at 'rolling' with the European management team." Come on, people. "Rolling?" Does anyone actually say that? Next we're going to hear that Toby Coppel was swinging with the flippity-flop.
Daring Fireball's John Gruber takes on Jerry Yang in his very funny "Translation From PR-Speak to English of Selected Portions of Yahoo CEO Jerry Yang's Company-Wide Memo Regarding the Microsoft Takeover Bid."
valleyspeak
The classics of art, translated into geekspeak
As undergrads, Silicon Valley tycoons didn't have the time to appreciate the finer things a liberal arts education had to offer. They were far too busy coding away in their dorm rooms and plotting to take over the world. Now these poor lads and lasses face a Herculean task whenever they're confronted with, say, Rodin's "The Thinker" at the Legion of Honor — they just don't know what to make of it. More »
"I just threw away 5 months of Wired, unread. There may be some newly-minted jargon for that, but I have no way of knowing." - Adam Lisagor
w00t
Videogamers game Word of the Year honors
I was really hoping "facebook" would be named Word of the Year by Merriam-Webster. But no, "w00t" — in l33t-speak no less — took home the honors. I should have known better than try to call an Internet poll. My mistake was underestimating the videogamer community's pull. Now if they could only agree on an etymology. More »
valleyspeak
Alternate definitions of "facebook"
The definitions of "facebook" submitted to Merriam-Webster are limited to logging in, viewing a profile, searching for a profile, and friending someone. But "facebook," as a word, is nearly as polymorphous as "smurf". We can think of several additional activities which the word describes far more accurately. More »
1:24 PM on Tue Dec 11 2007
By Tim Faulkner
559 views,
2 comments
valleyspeak
"Facebook" a shoo-in for word of the year
Just in case the rest of the world isn't paying attention to the Valley's throbbing hard-on for Facebook, Merriam-Webster has stacked the deck in favor of facebook for Word of the Year. Last year the honor went to Stephen Colbert's truthiness. While not as catchy, timely, or funny as truthiness, there is less doubt about facebook's value as Word of the Year than Facebook's valuation of $15 billion. More »
valleyspeak
Social nerdwanking
Coined by R. Stevens in his webcomic Diesel Sweeties, "social nerdwanking" means lording your social-network superiority over others, which is secretly the only reason you bother with Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, Orkut, and every other social network. Except your legitimate if fruitless use of Adult FriendFinder.
valleyspeak
Facebook founder redefines "opt-in"
People say the craziest things to New York Times reporters. In an attempt to explain that Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg wasn't, you know, lying when he implied to NYT staffer Louise Story that Facebook's Beacon ads wouldn't report on users' purchases and other activities unless they opted in to the system, "Matt Hicks, a Facebook spokesman, said Mr. Zuckerberg had meant that users would be given the opportunity to opt out of having information sent out by Beacon, and the company had assumed that anyone who didn't say no meant yes." As Story reports, Coke is having the same "Huh?" reaction, and has withdrawn from early participation in Beacon ads. I confess: I'm biased. I went to MIT, so whenever a Harvard man like Zuckerberg opens his mouth, I start listening for the bullshit. I wish I were wrong more often.
valleyspeak
