Valleywag: celebritards

Oprah wept on Silicon Valley investor Sam Perry

Owen Thomas — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 10:20:00 PST

The world watched Oprah Winfrey cry as our new Internet President delivered his victory speech. But whose shoulder did she dump mascara on? Sam Perry, a Reuters reporter turned venture capitalist based in Silicon Valley, who had volunteered as a communications director for the Obama campaign. Perry, who's due to appear on her show today, is now a visiting fellow at Stanford University and a consultant to startups. At Reuters, one of the investments he was involved with was Moreover Technologies, a news-aggregation startup cofounded by Valleywag's publisher, Nick Denton. Yes, small world. Watch Oprah sob on Perry:

Tila Tequila switches from Yahoo spawn to Mac guy

Adriana Nunez — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 12:00:00 PST

Promiscuous MySpace friender Tila Tequila recently denied reports that her relationship with Courtenay Semel, the publicly drunken daughter of former Yahoo CEO Terry Semel, was on the rocks. But The Superficial says the Hollywood Z-lister's shot at girl-on-girl love has ended. Why does she no longer Yahoo?

Gossip column Page Six spotted Tequila "hooking up" with Justin Long, best known for his role as a Mac in Apple commercials, at a Vegas nightclub on Halloween. Will the Mac preference stick? Who knows, but according the a New York Post spy, Long reportedly "asked her [Tequila] to straddle him while making out." What would John Hodgman have to say about this? (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images for Cirque du Soleil)

Ashton Kutcher pulls in the press for TechCrunch50

Paul Boutin — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 12:00:00 PDT

The New York Times and Los Angeles Times don't normally write about tech conferences. But if the host of MTV's Punk'd shows up to launch a cartoon site, so does the MSM. In a Q&A for the LA Times with former San Francisco Chronicle reporter Jessica Guynn, Kutcher explains his ties to Silicon Valley: "We have offices in L.A. and New York." (Photo by Andrew Mager)

Lindsay Lohan denies coke-fueled affair with Terry Semel's daughter

Nicholas Carlson — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 12:00:00 PDT

Former Yahoo CEO Terry Semel's daughter Courtenay told what reports call a "friend" that she and actress Lindsay Lohan met a party in the summer of 2006 and attending parties together "where they kissed and touched each other in the corner and did lines of cocaine in the toilet." Lohan denies the account: "No, that's not true." The friend says Courtenay thinks the drugs were Lohan's way of coping with a lesbian desires that she feared would ruin her career.

"At the time she was terrified her career would be over if she revealed her sexual tendencies," Courtenay told this "friend," who also says that "Courtenay still can't understand how Lindsay is now so open with [her current live-in girlfriend] Samantha [Ronson]," says the pal. "Every time she sees a picture of them together it kills her." Take heart, Courtenay. Daddy feels the same way about MySpace cuddling up with News Corp. At least you've got Tila Tequila. (Photos by AP and Getty)

For Barenaked Ladies, it's been one week from hell

Paul Boutin — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 10:20:00 PDT

BNL on drugs? Bay Area nerds love the goofy-smart Toronto rock band Barenaked Ladies for lots of reasons: Frontman Steven Page's pudgy physique. Punny, word-playful lyrics clean enough for junior high, but full of adult self-effacement. Musical arrangements that borrow from folk and a capella. The band's ironic rap about stuff white people like, "One Week," was licensed by Apple as one of ten preloaded tracks in the very first version of iTunes in 2001. BNL's theme song for current CBS sitcom The Big Bang Theory recaps the history of the universe (Australopithecus! Deuteronomy!) in under two minutes. So it was kind of a shock while reading up on co-frontman Ed Robertson's plane crash this weekend — all four on board escaped unharmed — to stumble upon a mug shot from Steven Page's, um, cocaine bust.

Believe it: Page, a father of three, separated from his wife last year and admitted to snorting coke with his new girlfriend prior to his arrest last month in upstate New York. On Friday, he was granted an extension of his court appearance to October in order to prepare his case. It seems way out of whack for nice-guy Page to do coke, but totally in character to admit it to the cops. There's a very clever song in here somewhere. (Photo by Manlius, NY Police Department)

Julia Allison earnestly explains the rise of the celebritard

Jackson West — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 03:00:00 PDT

CNN's Showbiz Tonight turned to Julia Allison to explain the phenomenon of tabloid regulars with little or no talent in this clip. She calls it the "de-evolution of celebrity." I can hear the producer on the phone now: "Hello, pot, we need someone to call the kettle black this afternoon. Are you available?" Of course, Allison doesn't just know how to put on makeup, wear a dress and pose like the rest of these creatures — she's an umtrepreneur!

"Entourage" star promises to use Microsoft, honest

Paul Boutin — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 13:20:37 PST

CNET's supertelegenic Natali Del Conte got a Microsoft-sponsored visit from Entourage star Jeremy Piven to talk up Office Live Workspaces. But as Natali said in an email: "They don't use Workspaces. Microsoft just got them to say that they will. I don't understand why Microsoft would have such a non sequitur way to promote this product. The product is good. Why bother with this nonsense?"

Indeed, Office Live Workspaces makes Google Docs look like Google 20 Percent of Microsoft Office. It even works on a Mac, so the Entourage guys need only fire up Firefox to use it. If Natali — who since January has appeared on CNBC , The CW, Fox Business News, ABC, Reuters, WNBC, and BBC TV twice before I stopped counting — likes it, what further celebrity endorsement do you need?

Celebritards threaten gossip-blogger protest

Nicholas Carlson — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 16:20:45 PST

First the Internet geeks of Anonymous pledged to destroy Scientology. Now "Z-list" celebrities want to take down gossip bloggers. Fine. Just so long as l don't wake up to find Philippe Dauman Jr., Michael Arrington, and Jimmy Wales chanting at me from behind Guy Fawkes masks. Far as I see it, only Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg's got a legit beef, and that's with TMZ.

Sean Penn caught in character as Harvey Milk

Paul Boutin — Sun, 10 Feb 2008 02:43:08 PST

You'll hardly recognize a scrawny Sean Penn in full facial hair and denim as gunned-down gay city supervisor Harvey Milk. Also caught in this fan footage: Emile Hirsch as gay activist Cleve Jones, and San Francisco's Castro Street as its former self, before the Straighty McStraights bought everything.

Silicon Valley's favorite drug helped kill Heath Ledger

Nicholas Carlson — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 09:20:28 PST

Medical examiners have released results of Heath Ledger's toxicology report earlier today. The young star died of an accidental overdose — an "acute intoxication" — from the combined effects of hydrocodone, diazepam, temazepam, alprazolam, doxylamine and oxycodone. The latter is the active substance in Silicon Valley's drug of choice, OxyContin.

Jay-Z, HP's star endorser, uses a Mac

Jordan Golson — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 17:00:12 PST

Jay-Z and girlfriend Beyonce seem to be Apple fans. No surprise there: Plenty of musicians use Macs. What is surprising? Jay-Z was in one of those Hewlett-Packard "hand" ads last year touting HP laptops. At least Tiger Woods actually wears Nike. Catch the ad after the jump.

(Photo by ashbyyokosuka)

David Lynch hates the iPhone

Mary Jane Irwin — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 10:40:11 PST

Some iPhone owners dive onto subway tracks to save their gadget. David Lynch would just as soon push you in front of an oncoming train. Appalled by the notion of viewing his movie on a cell phone, Lynch rants about the technology in one of the featurettes accompanying the special edition of Inland Empire: "It's a ... such a sadness, that you think you've seen a film on your .... your FUCKING telephone. Get real!"

Fake Bono draws real pitches

Paul Boutin — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 09:59:38 PST

I finally got the story behind Bono's alleged appearance at the Demo tradeshow last year. MindTouch cofounder Aaron Fulkerson recruited the singer from a U2 tribute band — Pavel Sfera from San Diego-area Desire — to walk around the show floor and do his shtick for laughs. Sfera, shown here with telejourno Natali Del Conte, turned out even better than the real thing: He ad-libbed monologues about Mother Teresa, Desmond Tutu and Jesus all over the place. Because of the real Bono's role at Elevation Partners, and oh just maybe an oversized sense of their own importance, Demo attendees believed what they wanted to believe: Saint Paul of Clontarf had come by their show to check out their startup! Fulkerson had to hustle Sfera out of the show after founders began excitedly pitching him. "I've got a cure for hunger," one gushed. It involved Web page markup technology. (Photo by Brian Solis, I think)

John Mayer totally blowing his geek cred

Paul Boutin — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 11:20:12 PST

Singer/songwriter/guitar-hero John Mayer, known in the Valley for his onstage appearances with Steve Jobs to demo Apple's GarageBand software, isn't living up (or down) to his onstage claims that he spends a lot of time alone in his bedroom — you know, with his guitar. Gossip rags report that Jobs's musician buddy was seen shnozzing with both Shrek voice actress Cameron Diaz and Friday Night Lights star Minka Kelly on separate dates over the weekend. We can only surmise that Jobs's reality distortion field works on actresses, too.

Paris Hilton, some E3 guy go crazy on video

Paul Boutin — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 16:02:42 PST

Bless your dorky Valley heart, you didn't catch TMZ's Paris Goes Postal clip over the weekend. More interesting to you is Boing Boing TV's newly unearthed footage of "comedy terrorist" Tim E. Woodsman running amok at the LA Convention Center during a pre-crash E3. Stupid, yes, but it's Monday.