Valleywag: Caption Contest

Steve Jurvetson, rude boy

Jackson West — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 16:00:00 PDT

"Omar first introduced me to dub reggae many moons ago, and I still have his 'Omar’s Dub' tapes," writes Draper Fisher Jurvetson VC Steve Jurvetson about his friend pictured here. Have a better caption? The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "The first child Google engineered from a 23andMe 'sample kit' waits for its brethren to hatch" by The_Chris2.0.(Photo from Steve Jurvetson)

The first child Google engineered from a 23andMe "sample kit" waits for its brethren to hatch

Jackson West — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Googler parents complaining about the soaring cost of childcare should be glad that the executive in charge wasn't Marissa Mayer. This photo, taken when Google senior UI designer Kerah Pelczarski took her infant over to Aunt Marissa's Four Seasons penthouse apartment, gives one a taste. Mayer was having Seattle artist Dale Chihuly's signature colorful blown-glass art installed in November 2006. I don't know if I'm more surprised that Pelczarski let the infant play on a floor full of glass, or that Mayer let Chihuly use tertiary colors. But given Mayer's predilection for mixing business and pleasure, I have to think a Mayer-designed childcare center would have cost much more than $50,000 per student a year. Have a better caption? The best one will become the new headline. Thursday's winner: "This is how we elect the board of directors" by giddieup. (Photo by marissa)

"This is how we elect the board of directors"

Jackson West — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 16:00:00 PDT

A faux-surfer bails on a compress-air wave at the summer party held on Yahoo's Sunnyvale campus yesterday. Have a better caption? The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "Hotmail? Hot bride!" by sarahfu67. (Photo by Yodel Anecdotal)

Hotmail? Hot bride!

Jackson West — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Sabeer Bhatia, the Hotmail founder who gleaned a cool $400 million in the email startup's sale to Microsoft, got married this year to the gorgeous Tanya Sharma, heiress to the Baidyanath Group fortune. This picture of the bride and groom from the nuptials held on "the exclusive Malaysian Island of Langkawi" was published by our new favorite anonymous blogger covering the Indian tech and outsourcing scene who promises further dish. Have a better caption? The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do." by kadedworkin.

"I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do."

Jackson West — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 16:00:00 PDT

With the takeover of CNET by CBS Interactive complete, the parent company's signature logo in the subsidiary's signature orange watches over employees at the San Francisco office. Have a better caption? The best one will become the new headline. Friday's winner: "It isn't broken, it's reorged." by sarahfu67.

It isn't broken, it's reorged

Jackson West — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

With Jerry Yang and company trying to pick up the pieces, shattered glass might be a better analogy than "systematic rot," but it's been used before. Have a better analogy? The best one will become the new headline. Friday's winner: "Affirmative... I poked one. It was dead." by godospoons. (Photo by Jerry Paffendorf)

"Affirmative... I poked one. It was dead."

Jackson West — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Spotted in Dolores Park, a group of Firefox 3 fans building a robot from household items. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "Spoiler Alert: Eric Schmidt Named As Final Cylon." by WagCurious. (Photo by JP Puerta)

Spoiler Alert: Eric Schmidt Named As Final Cylon

Jackson West — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

And I thought I was joking about Robot Steve Jobs — Google is already developing the Cylon army that eventually attempts to destroy humanity. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "Yeah? Is this Yahoo HQ? I heard you are running low on people." by G2GdoB2B. (Photo by Marcin Wichary)

"Yeah? Is this Yahoo HQ? I heard you are running low on people"

Jackson West — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Financial engineer Joshua Persky, an MIT alum, is walking the streets of Manhattan looking for work. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "Those Mormons might be on to something" by Duncan. (Photo from Getty/Spencer Platt)

Those Mormons might be on to something

Jackson West — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Dodgeball founder and departed Googler Dennis Crowley celebrates his 32nd birthday by embracing his sister. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "Yet another Valley Mashup" by jim_rock. (Photo from Dennis Crowley)

Yet another Valley Mashup

Jackson West — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Yes, everyone in the comments have been clamoring for Valleywag's Owen Thomas to come back. While he told me to ignore the rabble, I figured I'd treat his fans to Thomas and Very Special Correspondent Paul Boutin sharing an intimate moment at last week's Reddit party. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Friday's winner: "Quadruple snap in an A formashun!" by godospoons. (Photo by Brian Solis, bub.blicio.us)

"Quadruple snap in an A formashun!"

Jackson West — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Sydney residents stop drinking XXXX Export and making fun of the wankers in Melbourne to wait in line for the opening of a new Apple Store, where they were greeted by the typical forced enthusiasm from employees. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "FUCK IT, WE'LL DO IT LIVE! THIS THING SUCKS!" by matto. (Photo by Catherine)

"FUCK IT, WE'LL DO IT LIVE! THIS THING SUCKS!"

Jackson West — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

A reader who watched a recent episode of Cranky Geeks thought the ring on Natali Del Conte's finger meant she got hitched. An instant message to the perky, petite host of CNET TV's Loaded, shown here preparing for a show, confirmed what we already knew, since the ring is on the right hand, not the left. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "How can I insult this guy's architecture in 140 characters or less?" by oaktowner. (Photo by Andrew Mager)

Damn, forgot this job came with a side of Scoble

Jackson West — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Valleywag's very special correspondent Paul Boutin is back, but could a meeting with Robert Scoble at Supernova presage Scoble's return as our mascot as well? Nah. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "You're gonna need a warrant for that search, officer. Or a web browser." by ThatKid.

"You're gonna need a warrant for that search, officer. Or a web browser."

Jackson West — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

A Google Street View driver ran afoul of the Presidio's park police at this popular view spot overlooking the Golden Gate — plenty more pictures where that came from. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Friday's winner: "My arched right eyebrow? That means that I am pheeling phrisky.." by actionhero11. (Photo by Damian Spain)

My arched right eyebrow? That means that I am pheeling phrisky

Jackson West — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Plurk's "overlord" may have described this startup as a hoax, but Pheltup fever continues to spread thanks to viral marketing like stickers and a a wild launch party last night. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "Google begins testing its new camouflage Steath Shuttle." by Swifter. (Photo by Rachel Glaves)

Google begins testing its new camouflage Steath Shuttle

Jackson West — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

A tipster says this is a "Google Shuttle going green by picking up tree limbs while driving down Garcia Ave." What can't Google do? How about suggesting a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "Anyone got a cigar they want me to light?" by m0nty.au.

Anyone got a cigar they want me to light?

Owen Thomas — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Pete Cashmore, the blogger impersonator and CEO of Mashable, waves his wad at an Internet Week party in New York. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "I'm leaving, Larry said there'd be girls here," by 26footjasontaylor.
(Photo by Brian Solis/Bub.blicio.us)

I'm leaving, Larry said there'd be girls here

Jackson West — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Google engineering VP Vic Gundotra, right, presumably sending reports back to the Android team from just before yesterday's announcement of the latest iPhone version by Apple CEO Steve Jobs. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "Tumblr? I just met her!" by fairoak. (Photo by Vasanth Sridharan)

Tumblr? I just met her!

Nicholas Carlson — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

IAC subsidiary CollegeHumor's Hottest College Girl in America Party, held Thursday night at New York club Room Service, was not an official Internet Week party. Yet above, we have Tumblr's David Karp, said college girl and a piece of tape in photographic proof that such a minor detail didn't stop New York digerati attending. The photo needs a caption. Make your suggestions in the comments and we'll rename the post with the best one. Friday's winner is Vulture with: "Serge Faguet cameos in a John Hughes movie VH1 special."

Serge Faguet is not happy to see you

Owen Thomas — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Remember Serge Faguet, the fired CEO of Sequoia-backed startup TokBox? He's got a startup in stealth mode, according to LinkedIn, but from the looks of this photo sent by a tipster, he's not working especially hard. (Faguet's at left, pointing, in the blue shirt.) Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "You said there would be girls here," by our own Fake Michael Arrington.

Kevin Rose and Alex Albrecht love this guy

Jackson West — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Alex Albrecht and Kevin Rose play buns to this hot dog at the Diggnation Live party last night in New York. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: mzito for "How do you make a bubble? You put your lips together and *blow*." (Photo by William J Sisti)

How do you make a bubble? You put your lips together and blow

Jackson West — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Blue Whale Labs co-founder Greg Narain not making some sort of blogger gang sign at the Under the Radar conference in San Francisco yesterday. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: Swifter for "No, I am not Julia Allison." (Photo by Brian Solis)

"No, I am not Julia Allison."

Jackson West — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Natali Del Conte looking more Fashion Week than Internet Week in a black dress and pearls, speaking at the New York Media Information Exchange Group meetup. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: 26footjasontaylor for "IMPEACH BALLMER. 12 GALAXIES FOR ZEGNOTRONIC ROCKET FUTURE. MSNBC: HARDBALL. MEXELOTRELLIS. HASTERPONIC LESBIANS. VISTA SP1." (Photo by Alexa)

Frank Chu at Laughing Squid's Lucky 13 party

Jackson West — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Ubiquitous San Francisco icon Frank Chu cages a smoke from a fellow party-goer at last weekend's 13th anniversary party for artsy ISP Laughing Squid. Can you suggest a more kryxocryogenical caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Friday's winner: groslac for "Google to acquire invisible hand of markets." (Photo by Andrew Mager)

Google to acquire invisible hand of markets

Jackson West — Fri, 30 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Business strategist Gary Hamel interviews surprisingly effusive Google CEO Eric Schmidt. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: TemplaHeron, for "Google I/O afterparty, May 29, 1977." (Photo by Steve Jurvetson)

Google I/O afterparty, May 29, 1977

Jackson West — Thu, 29 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Wonder how much Google paid to hire away the designers from Duplo for the event. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: rwe112, for "So, seriously, neither of you spray tan? Hahahaha." (Photo by Alessio Bragadini)

So, seriously, neither of you spray tan? Hahahaha

Owen Thomas — Wed, 28 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

CARLSBAD, CA — D6 conference organizer Kara Swisher and bicoastal überflack Brooke Hammerling prepare to torment former Facebook COO Van Natta, who doesn't seem to mind. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments, but behave yourselves and be clever, or I'll ban all you filthy louts. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: Jimmy the Saint, for "Sometimes that new iPhone is just a cigar."

Sometimes that new iPhone is just a cigar

Owen Thomas — Tue, 27 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Sexygenarian gadget reviewer Walt Mossberg and feisty gossipmonger Kara Swisher, the disgrumptive pair behind the Wall Street Journal's D conference and AllThingsD.com website. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments, and the winner will become this post's new headline. Yesterday's winner: digital2 for "Google: Organizing the world's crap." (Photo by Asa Mathat/AllThingsD.com)

Google: Organizing the world's crap

Jackson West — Mon, 26 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

A golden retriever takes a break from a walk along Lincoln Avenue in San Diego, California as its owner watches a Google Street View van drive by and capture the moment. Couldn't Google have blurred the poor dog's face with it's advanced animal-privacy protection software? Suggest a caption in the comments, and the best will become the new headline. Friday's winner: ballmer, for "MILFbook!" (Via Faildogs)

MILFBook!

Owen Thomas — Fri, 23 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Most of Facebook's adult supervision gave the Facebook Prom a skip, we hear. But not recently hired Google execs Elliot Schrage, now Facebook's top flack, and Sheryl Sandberg, the formidable new COO who's revising Facebook's internal social graph day by day. We heard Schrage and Sandberg were tight at Google, but close enough for this "me-and-my-bitches" pose captured at the Facebook Prom event held two weeks ago? (Camille Hart, Sandberg's assistant, is on the left; she also followed Sandberg to Facebook.) Suggest a caption in the comments, and the best will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: abmw, for "They never have enough restrooms in these Apple Stores."

They never have enough restrooms in these Apple Stores

Jackson West — Thu, 22 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Above is a picture of a line of shoppers waiting patiently for non-existent iPhones at New York's 14th Street Apple Store as inventory dwindles ahead of the new, updated version widely guessed to be released in June. Guess they want to be the first of the last in line for soon-to-be outdated hardware. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments, and the winning one will become the new headline on this post. Wednesday's winner, late but worth it: WilliamMarkFelt, for "When you have the world by the balls, you can foist crap like Vista on them."

When you have the world by the balls, you can foist crap like Vista on them

Jackson West — Wed, 21 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Director James Cameron speaking at Microsoft's advance08 advertising conference today in Seattle, pitching his new flick Avatar and making a menacing gesture. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments, and the winning one will become the new headline on this post. Friday's winner, in a close one: Tim Faulkner, for "Master Lodwick has trained his young padawan well in the ways of the fameball.." (Photo by AP/Stephen Brashear)

Master Lodwick has trained his young padawan well in the ways of the fameball

Jackson West — Tue, 20 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Spotted at the MashBash in New York City on Saturday, CNET reporter Caroline McCarthy with Tumblr founder David Karp and Michelle DeForest of NextNewNetorks. Karp and McCarthy are officially an item we understand, which warms our geeky hearts. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments, and the winning one will become the new headline on this post. Friday's winner, in a close one: rwe112, for "Now it's time on Sprockets when we dance." (Photo by Leora Zellman)

Now it's time on Sprockets when we dance

Jackson West — Mon, 19 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Proud Google CEO and father figure Eric Schmidt looks on as Sergey Brin and Larry Page announce their undying love for each other in the wake of the California Supreme Court decision legalizing gay marriage. We kid! Or fantasize, what have you. But we couldn't resist when our tipster pointed out how the young founders' outfits matched a little too well while speaking at a Google Zeitgeist event. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments, and the winning one will become the new headline on this post. Friday's winner: Torley, for "Our hero travels back in time to star in Breakfast Club 2." (Photo by Joi Ito)

Our hero travels back in time to star in Breakfast Club 2

Owen Thomas — Fri, 16 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Before he turned into a Philip Seymour Hoffman clone, there was a time when Fast Company videoblogger Robert Scoble looked more like James Spader. And here we thought Scoble was a run-of-the-mill nerd before he found his videocamera! Thousands of Facebook friends and Twitter followers have not improved him. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments, and the winning one will become the new headline on this post. Thursday's winner: sample032, for "Google raises the stakes in competition with rival Baidu." (Photo by Steve Sloan)

Google raises the stakes in competition with rival Baidu

Owen Thomas — Thu, 15 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Google has been hoping to get more market share in China, but surely not this way. A tipster sends in this photo of bus ads in Xi'an, China, advertising "Googirls" with the search engine's familiar candy-colored design. Is this another Marissa Mayer project? Suggest a caption in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Wednesday's winner: "The first rule of Hair club is you do not talk about Hair Club," by FlakJack.

The first rule of Hair Club is you do not talk about Hair Club

Jackson West — Wed, 14 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Hollywood star Edward Norton gleefully shakes hands with San Francisco mayor Gavin Newsom at a hearing on green building practices today before the Select Committee on Energy Independence and Global Warming on Capitol Hill. Write your own caption, and the winner becomes the new headline. Yesterday's contest drew no winning entries, so do try harder, won't you? (Photo by AP/Lawrence Jackson)

Chadrick loves Diana, and the feeling is mutual

Owen Thomas — Tue, 13 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

The act that first brought Chadrick Baker, virtual-worlds advocate and lover of love, to our attention was his declaration of romantic fealty to four Valley foxes. Bad news for Sarah Meyers, Amanda Lorenzani, and Sarah Lacy: Baker has found his feelings for Ask.com art director Diana Furka requited. Before declaring their feelings, the two pursued a platonic paternship on a website, Oddistry.com. Good luck, you crazy kids! As for the rest of you, can you think of a better caption for mascot and mate? Suggest one in the comments, and it will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "You mean this isn't the Facebook prom?" by dannyisme.

You mean this isn't the Facebook prom?

Owen Thomas — Mon, 12 May 2008 16:00:00 PDT

Despite not making the cut for this year's Time 100, Wikipedia founder Jimmy Wales showed up at the magazine's party anyway. (Past honorees are reinvited to the party automatically.) Even more surprising: On his arm was Andrea Weckerle, the freelance public-relations professional long rumored to have been smitten with Wales. If this photo is an indication, her affections are less unrequited than has been said.

Last fall, Weckerle interviewed Wales to get advice on how flacks can use Wikipedia to buff their clients' images. Wales is separated from his wife, Christine; the last time he mixed Wikipedia editing with pleasure, things ended badly. Can you come up with a better caption? Suggest one in the comments, and it will become the post's new headline. Friday's winner: hopelessdeskmonkey, for "Robot CEO smuggles human wife into movie premiere"

(Photo by Craig Newmark)