Valleywag: fake steve

Real Steve (W.) meets Fake Steve (J.)

Owen Thomas — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 17:46:26 PDT

Dan Lyons, the faux Apple CEO blogger, is introduced by the real Steve Wozniak. Check Woz's manic but funny patter about Kathy Griffin, Fake Steve, and Apple.

Fake Steve Jobs goes to Wired

Chris Mohney — Thu, 22 Feb 2007 06:00:04 PST

Well, "goes to" might be too strong a word, but Wired will henceforth be sponsoring the Fake Steve Jobs blog. One presumes he'll be turning in some Wired material as well. And just for the record, we only pursued Fake Steve in the sexual sense.

Fake Steve Jobs blog taken over by Fake Bono

Paul Boutin — Thu, 22 Nov 2007 22:54:18 PST

"I saw that Steve had left himself logged in," writes Fake Bono from Fake Jobs's fake home in lovely fake Woodside. "I had to text Edge to find out how to give myself an account and then change Steve's password. Shhh. He hasn't figured it out yet." Do I even have to explain this one?

The fanboys at The Unofficial Apple Weblog ...

Owen Thomas — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 21:05:42 PDT

The fanboys at The Unofficial Apple Weblog wimp out, declaring their search for Fake Steve Jobs over before they even began. [TUAW]

CNET lands an actual interview with Fake ...

Megan McCarthy — Tue, 03 Jul 2007 10:59:02 PDT

CNET lands an actual interview with Fake Steve Jobs, but questions about his identity are off-limits. "No me gusta, as they say in French." [CNET]

Owen Thomas at Business 2.0 reveals the first ...

Megan McCarthy — Fri, 08 Jun 2007 15:42:03 PDT

Owen Thomas at Business 2.0 reveals the first known picture of the elusive Fake Steve Jobs. Do you recognize that hand? [Owen Thomas ]

Fake Steve Jobs accepts "stupid plastic monkey award"

Jordan Golson — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 18:32:17 PST

No one from Apple actually showed up to accept their award at the Crunchies Friday, so Dan Lyons obliged, as Fake Steve Jobs.

Woz likes Fake Steve Jobs better than real one

Megan McCarthy — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 11:43:29 PDT

At yesterday's book signing at Keplers in Menlo Park, Apple cofounder Steve Wozniak penned this inscription on the pages of Dan Lyons's Steve Jobs parody novel, Options: "I like this Steve J. better than the real one." Was he kidding? Maybe. But many a truth is said in jest.

At trial, Fake Steve proves to be a cowardly Lyons

Owen Thomas — Sun, 05 Aug 2007 15:07:24 PDT

New York Times writer Brad Stone was all set to accuse Forbes editor Dan Lyons of being Fake Steve Jobs. The carefully assembled evidence: Phrases like "mwah," "fair enough," and "peace and love" that popped up in both Lyons' blog and Fake Steve's, as well as Lyons' geographical location in Boston, where email headers had long indicated Fake Steve's presence. And Lyons is a published novelist. Faced with this evidence, Lyons didn't even put up a fight.

Fake Steve Jobs runs scared

Owen Thomas — Wed, 18 Jul 2007 11:52:12 PDT

Someone has spooked Fake Steve Jobs. Drifting in and out of character as Apple's CEO, Fake Steve has posted some rambling accusations on his blog about Valleywag publisher Nick Denton. I'm pretty sure FSJ is pulling another one of his over-the-top jokes, but for the record, Denton is far too cheap to shell out money to pay a private investigator to tail Fake Steve.

Dan "Cowardly" Lyons of Forbes commits the ...

Owen Thomas — Mon, 06 Aug 2007 19:49:36 PDT

Dan "Cowardly" Lyons of Forbes commits the worst sin of any blogger: being boring. [The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs]

Forbes editor Daniel Lyons is Fake Steve Jobs

Owen Thomas — Sun, 05 Aug 2007 14:56:14 PDT

The jig is up, the secret is out, the game is over: Forbes editor Dan Lyons is Fake Steve Jobs, the now-unmasked author of The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs. Brad Stone of the New York Times, to my dismay, was the one to out Lyons as the faux Apple CEO. It was crushing. I've known for some time now that several Forbes employees were in on the secret. Lyons, as Fake Steve, even hinted at the outing in a post today: "My world, anyway, is about to change." My apologies to readers. But it makes perfect sense. Here are the not-so-coincidental similarities between Lyons's chosen enemies and Fake Steve's.

Freetards. Fake Steve has no love for Linux acolytes. And Daniel Lyons may be the only writer Linux acolytes hate more than Fake Steve. Now the objects of their wrath are revealed to be one and the same.
Microtards. First Lyons does the sober interview with Steve Ballmer, and then, as Fake Steve, tells us what the Microsoft CEO is really thinking.
Blogtards. Fake Steve has it out for bloggers like Robert Scoble and, um, yours truly and my boss. Lyons is the author of the much-maligned Forbes cover story "Attack of the Blogs!" Of course, now we know that Lyons is a blogtard himself — twice over. Welcome to the tardosphere, Dan-o.

A Lexis-Nexis search confirms our suspicion ...

Nick Douglas — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 15:10:12 PDT

A Lexis-Nexis search confirms our suspicion that today's Wall Street Journal review of Fake Steve Jobs's Options contains the first-ever use of the phrase "Holy friggin mother of Jesus" in a U.S. newspaper.

First Fake Steve Jobs went to Forbes.com; ...

Owen Thomas — Tue, 07 Aug 2007 22:48:26 PDT

First Fake Steve Jobs went to Forbes.com; now Freakonomics, the economics blog, has relocated to the New York Times website. The assimilation of blogs into mainstream media continues apace. [Freakonomics]

Andy Ihnatko comes out as a fake Fake Steve

Owen Thomas — Tue, 24 Jul 2007 12:09:44 PDT

Call off the virtual dogs: Andy Ihnatko has gracefully taken himself out of the running for secret writer of The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs. I'd like to say it was the cunning interview I conducted with Ihnatko, but Ihnatko proved more cunning than me, throwing me off the scent by hiding a piece of Fake Steve trivia he actually knew. In the pages of Macworld, however, Ihnatko is unequivocal in his denials, and I believe him. So with Ihnatko revealed as a fake Fake Steve, it's back to hunting for the real Fake Steve. I have one hot but hard-to-believe tip that I'm pursuing, but I always welcome more.

Fake Steve on Justine Ezarik aka iJustine ...

Tim Faulkner — Thu, 13 Sep 2007 09:29:00 PDT

Fake Steve on Justine Ezarik aka iJustine aka the hot chick lifecaster and her new Apple logo tattoo: "I know it's wrong for us to use women's bodies to sell our products. Is it also wrong for this woman to use our products to sell her body?" [The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs]

Fake Steve Jobs's book faces fake delay

Jordan Golson — Wed, 17 Oct 2007 11:52:33 PDT

Being an intrepid tech reporter, I buy books related to my work. I just picked up The Gawker Guide to Conquering All Media (obligatory: it is the greatest work ever put to print. You should buy copies for yourself and all your friends). I preordered Options by Forbes editor Dan Lyons, writing as Fake Steve Jobs, way back in July. I've been pantingly awaiting the arrival of my copy from Amazon.com. A few days ago, I got an email from Amazon saying my book arrival date was getting pushed back — to December 14. I thought it was just a mixup, but now we've heard from other sources that Amazon sent them the same email. What's going on? Here's what Fake Steve himself has to say about it.

"it's a mistake by amazon. sorry. book is out oct. 22. some stores in san fran already have stacks in the window.

Bizarre. First the Real Steve Jobs's operating system is delayed,. Now an apparent glitch in Amazon's software is making Fake Steve Jobs's book look delayed. One wonders if, despite that little MP3 rivalry their companies have going on, Real Jeff Bezos and Real Steve Jobs are teaming up to play tricks on Fake Steve.

Fake Steve rags on blog overlords

Owen Thomas — Fri, 26 Oct 2007 01:18:55 PDT

The best part of this interview with Dan Lyons, the Forbes editor behind Fake Steve Jobs? Where he describes how he tormented my boss, Nick Denton, by slipping in more and more British slang into The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs in an effort to throw him off the trail. Which, of course, succeeded brilliantly. To keep things balanced, Lyons also takes the piss out of Jason Calacanis. How anyone could hate the bulldog-cute entrepreneur that much is beyond me.

Where to buy Fake Steve Jobs's book today

Paul Boutin — Wed, 17 Oct 2007 12:55:46 PDT

Looking for a copy of Options, Fake Steve Jobs blogger Dan Lyons's parody of the Apple guru? As I type this, Borders in San Mateo has 3 copies. The San Francisco stores in Union Square and Stonestown each have 5. Sometimes, people, you need to quit Googling and pick up the phone. Dial now and ask them to hold you one, which they'll do for three days.

Forbes' Fake Steve plan revealed on TV

Owen Thomas — Mon, 06 Aug 2007 17:21:37 PDT

In an interview with CNBC, Dan Lyons, the Forbes senior editor revealed as Fake Steve Jobs, makes two fascinating admissions: First, that he has, in fact, not concluded negotiations with his employer on bringing the Secret Diary of Steve Jobs blog to Forbes.com. Second, that he and his employer did have a plan in the works to launch a Forbes-backed version of his site after Labor Day. I'm counting that as two hunches confirmed.

CNBC asks, "Who is this Fake Steve Jobs guy, anyway?"

Owen Thomas — Wed, 18 Jul 2007 09:28:46 PDT

Witness the dueling goatees! The raised eyebrows! The utter failure to reveal any new facts about the man behind The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs! News.com's Tom Krazit and I duke it out in trying to explain the Fake Steve Jobs phenomenon for CNBC's Melissa Francis. (Video by CNBC)

This'll teach Blackberry users

Tim Faulkner — Wed, 28 Nov 2007 14:18:00 PST

The British media may be knocking Apple's iPhone, but British cartoonists Charles Peattie & Russell Taylor understand the true significance of the computer maker's shiny mobile phone. Fake Steve Jobs links to a comic strip by the duo that perfectly captures the ethos of the iPhone ... and Fake Steve. Yes, it is elitist, that's the point. The complete cartoon after the jump.

Fake Steve's holiday fable fooled me, too

Nicholas Carlson — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 13:00:58 PST

Fake Steve Jobs has confirmed our very special correspondent's spoiler: The Apple lawsuit Dan Lyons blogged about is as fake as his blog. Some of you may feel duped or even a bit angry. Don't.

I'll even admit I was taken in by Lyons's artfully drawn fable, which made a point about the unseemliness of Think Secret blogger Nick Ciarelli agreeing to settle a lawsuit with Apple by shutting down his site. When a panicked reader pointed out the Fake Steve posts to me, I frantically IM'd my boss asking if we should cover the news. He tartly reminded me that Fake Steve Jobs was a parody blog. I felt foolish, but not angry. Creating suspension of disbelief is part of what great fiction is all about. Now I'm just wondering if I should've asked for Options for Christmas.

Fake Steve Jobs fakes out iPod lovers

Owen Thomas — Fri, 26 Oct 2007 14:19:32 PDT

After Dan Lyons, the Forbes editor who blogs as Fake Steve Jobs, visited Microsoft's main Redmond campus to talk about his new book, Options, he sat down for an interview with Microsoft's Channel 10. The best part? Fast forward 8:30 to the point where Lyons says, "I'm very excited about the Zune 80," Microsoft's latest music player. He then pretends to realize his gaffe: "People who read my blog are going to be very upset." Of course, any close readers of Fake Steve Jobs will know Lyons, in a classic move, dropped that bit in intentionally to drive the iPod-fanboy commentards on his blog batshit crazy. Dan Lyons invented this kind of thing on The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs. Have you heard of it?

Forbes assimilates Fake Steve Jobs

Owen Thomas — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 10:54:51 PDT

In his guise as Fake Steve Jobs, Forbes editor Dan Lyons occasionally broke character to ask his readers for help in getting advertising for his site. It turns out that he could have just asked his bosses all along. The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs is now running an ad served by Forbes. The current campaign is for IBM, just a few inches above a post in which Fake Steve Jobs gloats about Apple's market cap passing Big Blue's. And to think — for this treatment, IBM is paying Forbes' staggering $109 CPM? Translation: Every time your Web browser pays homage to Fake Steve, a dime and a penny clink in the Forbes coffers. Congratulations, Dan-O: At last, you've made your sideline career as El Jobso pay off.

Dan Lyons may restart Fake Steve Jobs blog for Newsweek

Paul Boutin — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 02:00:00 PDT

"I’m starting at Newsweek tomorrow and Fake Steve was supposed to be part of my job. So we’re going to discuss whether to revive the blog." — Excerpt from an email message from semi-retired Fake Steve Jobs blogger Dan Lyons to Mac Soda blogger mykbibby. Contrary to speculation by certain people we could name but won't, Lyons didn't kill the blog to curry favor with Apple for Newsweek. It was more personal.

Dan saw His Steveness in person at Apple's developer conference in June and had a sincere personal crisis over Jobs's obvious illness. He felt wrong mocking a guy who might not be alive the next morning. Because in case you can't tell, Dan Lyons is one of Jobs's biggest fanboys. Huge. (In photo: Dan getting his own fanboy love at Macworld Expo 2008 from stock analyst Charlie Wolf.)

Brad Stone, the ruggedly handsome Timesman ...

Owen Thomas — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 14:30:43 PDT

Brad Stone, the ruggedly handsome Timesman who outed Fake Steve Jobs, explains how Apple drove Forbes editor Dan Lyons to starting the faux-Apple CEO blog. [New York Times Bits Blog]

Fake Steve impersonated by One-Laptop PR shill

Jordan Golson — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 09:11:44 PDT

A few weeks ago, Forbes editor Dan Lyons, writing as Fake Steve Jobs, wrote a devastating analysis of the One Laptop Per Child project. On Tuesday, Wayan Vota, a blogger who follows the OLPC project, responded in essence, that while he agreed with Fake Steve, he still agreed with the project's aims. That would have been the end of it, except for a comment left on his post by "Fake Steve Jobs." The problem? Lyons didn't leave that comment. Vota compared the IP address that left the comment to others that he'd received and tracked it back to the Racepoint Group, the PR firm that reps OLPC. The commenter has since apologized, but the damage is done. To Kyle Austin, soon-to-be-fired flunky at Racepoint Group we say: great spin control. Proof after the jump.

(Screenshot from DCMetblogger)

"Facebook is a vehicle through which a bunch ...

Owen Thomas — Wed, 05 Mar 2008 15:30:54 PST

"Facebook is a vehicle through which a bunch of investors in the Valley hope to turn a small pile of money into a much bigger pile of money by selling shares in the public markets. That is Facebook's core business." [The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs]

Apple CEO Steve Jobs IMs the Times

Owen Thomas — Sun, 05 Aug 2007 17:30:07 PDT

The most fascinating bit in Brad Stone's exposé of Fake Steve Jobs? For commenter davidu, it was the revelation that real Apple CEO Steve Jobs was interviewed by instant messenger. Impressive: Someone at the Times — most likely John Markoff — has Jobs's iChat screenname. And editors at Gray Lady consented to the inclusion of notes from an IMterview. We sent our crack reporters on a digging mission and they discovered this exclusive transcript. Must credit Valleywag!

Maybe that last encore except from Options: ...

Nicholas Carlson — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 10:45:30 PDT

Maybe that last encore except from Options: The Secret Life of Steve Jobs, a Parody was one too many. It's early, sure, but the book ranks way down at No. 1,432 on Amazon's bestseller list. Lesson? Fake Steve needs to send Moshe up to Seattle to have a chat with Jeff Bezos. [Amazon.com]

Yahoo CEO Jerry Yang was spotted leaving ...

Owen Thomas — Fri, 12 Oct 2007 15:23:04 PDT

Yahoo CEO Jerry Yang was spotted leaving Facebook's Palo Alto headquarters, according to Fake Steve Jobs. FSJ's blog, written by Forbes editor Dan Lyons is highly satirical, but from what we hear, a meeting between Yang and Zuckerberg right now makes all the sense in the world. [The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs]

Fake Steve to meet other Steve

Paul Boutin — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 07:18:49 PDT

Options, the parody Steve Jobs novel, has totally surprised those of us who expected a throwaway. It's 248 mostly hilarious pages, with a tight story line and a protagonist who evolves credibly. You can read my enthusiastic review in Wednesday's Wall Street Journal, where it's the business book of the week. But more important is this teaser email from Kepler's Books in Menlo Park, where author Dan Lyons will appear Thursday evening.

Date: Oct 30, 2007 5:06 PM
Subject: Kepler's
To: fakestevejobs
I will be hosting you at Kepler's Books in Menlo Park CA. this
Thursday. I just wanted you to know I have someone special from Apple
Computer coming to introduce you, and his name is Steve as well.

Omigosh! Oh wait. This is going to be Steve Wozniak, right? Still. We'll be there.

Newsweek bosses ensure Fake Steve Jobs blogger will blog no more

Paul Boutin — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 14:40:00 PST

My worst fears for a favorite writer have been confirmed: Dan Lyons told Valleywag alumnus Jordan Golson via phone that (A) Newsweek, his new employer, ordered Lyons to remove a blog post calling Yahoo publicists "lying sacks of shit," and (B) rather than continue to blog under the boss's watchful eye, Lyons — once Internet-famous as the Fake Steve Jobs — has stopped blogging altogether. The man has two kids and Newsweek pays real money, so I'm not going to toss rocks. Except at Newsweek, which hired Lyons because of Fake Steve Jobs, his hilarious fake-Apple-CEO persona; urged him to blog outside the magazine; then freaked out when Lyons continued to write honestly in his spare time. You maniacs! You blew it up!

Why am I writing about Fake Steve Jobs blogging about Scoble?

Paul Boutin — Wed, 24 Oct 2007 18:09:38 PDT

PodTech, home to videoblogger Robert Scoble, is shutting down, says Fake Steve Jobs blogger and Forbes senior editor Dan Lyons. "Everybody in the Valley is just really bumming out," reports Fake Steve. "Except that of course everyone is also really heartened by this because it really confirms that the Web 2.0 model is viable and is really going to be huge." I'm sorry for the PodTech folks, but I have to ask: Does Lyons think the real Steve Jobs cares? UPDATE: Scobleizer says it's a "bull####" rumor.

When did any blog become a reliable source?

Owen Thomas — Thu, 25 Oct 2007 11:55:30 PDT

Fatally overserious Read/WriteWeb blogger asks when Forbes editor Dan Lyons's Secret Diary of Steve Jobs became a "reliable source." He points to recent posts Lyons wrote as Fake Steve Jobs about PodTech and Facebook — both of which Valleywag picked up. I think the question is more when anyone at Read/WriteWeb ever had a blog post as funny, informative, and truthful — even when fictional — as Fake Steve.

Dan Lyons quits Fake Steve Jobs before the real Steve Jobs drops dead on him

Owen Thomas — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 13:40:00 PDT

In humor, timing is everything. And death just ain't that funny. That's why Dan Lyons is quitting the Secret Diary of Steve Jobs blog. True, he's planning to turn his Fake Steve Jobs schtick into a second book. And his new job as Newsweek's gadget columnist may require more decorous relations with Apple — note that Newsweek, usually the object of favored treatment by Apple PR, didn't get an early iPhone 3G to review. But the real reason why Lyons is dropping Fake Steve? Because the state of the real Apple CEO's health had Lyons scared.

Jobs's scary-skinny appearance at an Apple event earlier this summer had everyone talking, including Lyons. While there turned out to be a reasonable explanation for Jobs's frail frame — aftereffects of surgery for pancreatic cancer — and people with Jobs's specific ailment have a high survival rate, Lyons concluded that posing as a guy recovering from cancer just couldn't be humorous for much longer.

Hence his attempts to write as Fake Jerry Yang and a Google insider. None of the alternate personae really took. Just as well. Some thought that after the New York Times unmasked him last year, Lyons's blog wouldn't be as good. Instead, he just got better. As Lyons proved on his book tour for Options, his first Fake Steve novella, he is riotously funny as himself. Goodbye, Fake Steve Jobs; hello, Real Dan Lyons. Where have you been hiding?

Timesman Brad Stone gets his own fake blog

Owen Thomas — Mon, 06 Aug 2007 08:55:00 PDT

It was just a matter of time. Brad Stone, the ruggedly handsome New York Times reporter who outed Forbes editor Dan "She-Lion" Lyons as Fake Steve Jobs, now has his own fake blog. "I am the best journalist ever," the Stone impersonator writes. Funny because it's true. Brad, I hope you're honored. At the very least, this should remove any lingering questions you had on whether you deserve A-list blogger status. And the "childish sense of wonderment"? None of that for the She-Lion. It's all for you, baby, all for you.

Dan Lyons going to Newsweek makes encounter with Real Steve Jobs almost inevitable

Jackson West — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 15:40:00 PDT

Newsweek, along with Time, the Wall Street Journal and the New York Times, is on the short list of publications that Apple CEO Steve Jobs will actually deign to meet and speak with. Dan Lyons, aka Fake Steve Jobs, is taking over as the lead tech reporter at Newsweek. That leads us to a tantalizing conclusion: It can't be long before Fake Steve Jobs and Real Steve Jobs meet in person. Like the attempt at discovering the Higgs boson at the Large Hadron Collider, the unintended consequences could involve the earth folding in on itself. We wait with bated breath.

Steve Jobs and John McEnroe

Nick Denton — Tue, 12 Jun 2007 07:28:58 PDT

Fake Steve Jobs, the spoof online diary of Apple's narcissistic founder, makes a good observation. Steve Jobs is aging well but, particularly when he's in mid-grimace, during an important presentation, he bears an striking resemblance to John McEnroe, the former tennis star, making a particularly difficult shot.