This type situation happened to me not too long ago. An angry butch woman sprayed me as she shouted, "WERE YOU TAKING UNAUTHORIZED PHOTOS DURING THE SHOW!"

First I was insulted, then terrified, and then the longer it went on, I became raging pissed.

It happens. Don't let it get the best of you or dampen your spirit. If you had been a woman, the exchange would have possibly been smoother.

The photos show a great deal of testosterone.

Congrats on your new job; make some memories.

Besides, he would be nice looking without the ..whatever that is.

I think I'll send him an email and see if he wants to go on a date with me. I'll strap him down, whip my comb out and force a new ~do~ on him.

She said, she said, that he said while on the phone in the mens room, IN TEARS, that Ohma was not the kind of girl he'd bring home to mom. She is more of the predator snake type, I mean-look in her eyes. She could be taking advantage of poor Mike. So Mike was upset by the OHMA joke talking about his Mom. And he doesnt like anyone talking about MOM! He thought that I work for Valleywag...well NOT. No way, shape or form. I have better things to do than gossip. Geeze.

I work at the DMV-because I like a job where I can work at my own pace.

Anyhow, this experience thrust him momentarily back into his childhood.

In his mind, YOU were the bullies.

Mikey doesn't like that.

When Mikey was a kid, this other kid named Donnie would tease him at school all the time.

Yer Momma this, Yer Momma that. One day Mikey just lost it. The kids said he went scarlett red in the face, nutso like a beast and started bashing Donnie's face in. He beat him so bad the kid needed stitches.

Just be careful, you just...never know about Mikey. Let's not bring out the inner child.

now there is an oxymoron.

"Successful?"

Does being "highly paid" make someone successful?

Her name is Ohma.

OH OK, well, there was that one night we were sipping B&B and I turned into a gay man for just a few minutes. Thank goodness for overdraft protection.

PETER LISTEN HONEY! LISTEN. TWO HOLES ARE BETTER THAN ONE! GIVE US ANOTHER CHANCE!

Don't you see the black circles under his eyes? He is suffering from insomnia, low self esteem, I mean, LOOK at what he is accompanied by! Whew. Her dermatologist had a patch on his eye.

He could very well have changed his anti-depressants and this just might send him into orbit.

I think that was really cruel of you and you really need to think about how it is that you are really benefiting from causing emotional distress to a fellow human being. Are you perfect?

Call LISA MIKE-ASAP!

(am I banned yet?)

Nonetheless, I must comment on the choice of color. That is not a very feminine nail polish color. MGG has to be a lesbian. Beautiful toes, poor presentation. Oh my, can we just start with eliminating the word "totally" from the vocab?

Now you are at some sex conference doing god knows what, but when you get back home-here in the Valley where we live, I want to read a story on PRENUPS. It's been mentioned a lot here lately. Clauses, expectations, and how both men and women perceive the subject. Thank you very much, I look forward to reading your research!

"Peter, Oh Peter, I'm feeling pressure, not so hard big boy."

If I was a gay man I would probably choose one that looked like Peter.

Ooooomaaaa. Was this some midnight dream about his mom or something he heard at a massage parlor?

You only know that he would be considered a "geek" by outside sources or stero-typical magazine standards.

See, one time I had a thing for big muscle guys, and started to date one. Then I got his pants off and there stood only about 4 inches. (Hey my requirements aren't that high, but 4 inches!)Suddenly I felt moral, and said, "oh God, I can't do this, this is wrong, gotta go!" Tried to have a conversation with the guy, but he could only tell me the calorie content in a can of tuna.

Forever equate muscles and stupidity/small penis.

"The honest geek collectors won't be able to help themselves: When chatting you up, they'll inevitably let slip stories of conquests past."

I suppose I am now officially a collector....only problem is I don't have a collection. Humph. Maybe I'll check to see if there are any on ebay. What the heck is Ruby on Rails?

If she is "waiting" for him to "spring for dinner", she must not have that much to offer. Maybe she is content with a Happy Meal. Poor thing.

Good looking women don't lower themselves to such a place unless they are just entertaining themselves and with no intention to meet anyone in real life.

Attractive women can just go to the post office, a bookstore, coffee shop, or the grocery store. When you are a sexy charismatic woman that is desirable, men offer themselves to you EVERY. WHERE. YOU. GO.

I misunderstood what he said. HE didn't say she had been married four times. He said she had been married "before this time." He didn't say they were going to have 16 kids, he said 16 fish. And last but not least, he said it was not that he loved her for her "innards", he said they were "nerds."

She is a cutie though, he sent me a few photos of them together. Just wanted to wish Andrew and Lois a happy life together. Congrats to the two of you!!!!

Adorable couple! May God bless you both!

Damn Chinese girls, stealing all our men. We've gotta start building American run Chinese Resrants. That is the answer! Then we can at least confine them to the massage parlors.

He is spending time evaluating his new life, its new phase, and enjoying the simple things he once enjoyed. He is rediscovering a normal life. All the while, he is still working Various, and planning his permanant departure.

Andrew is very interested in aquaculture, he has purchased a small boat, and is somewhere in the Pacific ocean at this very moment, accompanied by his fiance-a devout Lutheran. Lois is a woman of high moral reproach that he met at bigchurch.com. She is not very attractive, but he likes her for her innerds.

They are building a treehouse in the forest. He is chopping wood for the winter, and she is canning jams and beans. Although they are starting late in life, they are planning a family of 16-some of the children are from her 4 previous marriages.

Andrew reports that he has found his "quintessential great find", and is very happy.