Jon Friedman's media columns for MarketWatch rarely leave me short on words. But the worst thing I can say about his latest one, which hails Valleywag as a new media creation which he says has surpassed its New York "cousin" Gawker, is that it goes on far too long. 726 words of logorrhea on a gossip rag? Even on a slow news day, that's too much to bother reading. Forthwith, a 100-word version of "How Valleywag trumps Gawker — and enlivens Silicon Valley":

Owen Thomas, the managing editor of Valleywag, has a succinct way of summarizing his editorial philosophy. "Is there anybody I haven't offended?" he asked. Probably not. San Francisco-based Valleywag, a blog that bills itself as a "tech gossip rag," delights in exposing Silicon Valley's pompous and hypocritical icons and publicity-hungry wannabes. "Silicon Valley is built on delusions. You don't have to be a hateful person to report the truth. Some people say Valleywag will stab you in the back. That's a lie. Valleywag will stab you in the face. We say what's necessary."

12:20 AM on Wed Apr 9 2008
By Owen Thomas
1,335 views
18 comments

Comments

jackparsons at 12:36 AM on 04/09/08
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If I were a woman, or a transgendered F2M person, I would like to conceive a moonchild with Owen Thomas.
ThatKid at 01:21 AM on 04/09/08
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"Valleywag will stab you in the face."

Awesome.
donmiguel at 02:38 AM on 04/09/08
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Valleywag will stab you in the face then say rude things about the job your mom does as a Rails developer. Then they'll tell you that their girlfriend is hotter than yours because she used to be a stripper. Being dissed and liking it? Cool. But being emasculated at the same time? Priceless.
Tnuc at 03:34 AM on 04/09/08
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@donmiguel: .. and for everything else, there's MasterCard.
Tim Faulkner at 04:22 AM on 04/09/08
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A 100-word version and half the words are your own, Owen. Bravo.
BalknChain at 06:31 AM on 04/09/08
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Guess I'll have to drop by Valleywag more often to witness the face stabbing. There may need to be a poll about the whole Valleywag trumping Gawker theory though.
TerseNursePornstein at 06:48 AM on 04/09/08
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Hi Owen. Welcome to my personal pantheon. I look forward to worshiping you. Please let me know if I can get you anything--sheep, blood sacrifice, whatever.
raincoaster at 07:43 AM on 04/09/08
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93 words. Count different.

Owen Thomas will stab you in the face. Nick Douglas will rickroll you and then spend 800 words explaining 4chan.
Hamilton Nolan at 07:56 AM on 04/09/08
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I knew Jonnie Friedman would be unable to resist your charms.
sample032 at 08:15 AM on 04/09/08
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@jackparsons:
"Valleywag is at its best when Thomas, his "very special correspondent" Paul Boutin ("to say he is a 'special correspondent' isn't enough," Thomas said)..."

Get in line.
timwhite at 08:23 AM on 04/09/08
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I'm considering putting Owen Thomas in my Fave Five.
de wolfe at 09:02 AM on 04/09/08
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Stabbywag.
categorically at 09:11 AM on 04/09/08
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What is Valleywag?
macbeach at 10:01 AM on 04/09/08
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"stab you in the face" a least deserves a place on the masthead.
omnomnomnom at 12:13 PM on 04/09/08
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@jackparsons:
Jack, the word on the street is that Owen doesn't like va-jay-jays.
mjlambie at 01:39 PM on 04/09/08
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ridiculously true and awesome Sir Thomas.
jackparsons at 02:37 PM on 04/09/08
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@omnomnomnom:
So maybe my dream can come true? Create the Child of Babylon with me, Owen, for my moobs and manoveries are fertile.
fishneversleep at 03:27 PM on 04/10/08
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Owen would be the Herb Caen of our time, if Caen was good with numbers and liked to stab people in the face.